This all happened just an hour ago, and I’m still shaken. Forgive me if this feels long.
My boyfriend and I have been together for over two years. We met in college, where we both live on campus during the semester. My parents live nearby, but his family is six hours away. Since the campus closed during the pandemic, we haven’t seen each other in person.
He has a group of hometown friends I’ve never liked. They’ve known each other since high school, but they still act like they never left. Two brothers from a wealthy family don’t work or study; they spend their days smoking and playing games. Another friend is in the military, and the rest—including my boyfriend—are in college at different schools. He treasures their time together, so I’ve often had to spend time with them when visiting.
The reason I dislike them is simple: they don’t respect women. My boyfriend is the only one with a long-term relationship. The others openly dismiss girlfriends, saying women are only useful for physical pleasure. One even said it to my face. I speak up, so they resent me. Their mission seems to be convincing him to leave me. He never defends me, and most of our arguments stem from his silence when they mistreat me.
I should have held him accountable for their behavior, but it was easier to ignore them when they weren’t directly rude. Outside of those moments, he was a wonderful partner. I never imagined he would betray me so deeply.
The brothers live in a detached house where the group gathers. I’ve been there many times. It has its own kitchen and a basement they call their “man cave.” I rarely entered it. I’ve now learned that downstairs they keep a wall with their names and photos of women they’ve been intimate with. Many are nude, displayed like trophies in a twisted game.
I discovered this through the brothers’ sister, who saw the wall herself. She reached out to me privately and showed me proof. My boyfriend had fewer photos than the others, but one was mine—a full-body nude I had sent him in trust. My face wasn’t visible, but my tattoo made it unmistakable. I never consented to anyone else seeing it.
I called him, distraught. At first he denied everything, then admitted the wall existed but claimed the photo wasn’t me. When I insisted, he broke down, begged forgiveness, then shifted to irritation, asking why it mattered since I’m “attractive.” I hung up, sickened.
He shared my private image with men who already demean me. He allowed them access to my body without my consent. I feel violated, betrayed, and ashamed.
I cannot forgive him. I may pursue legal action if I can secure more evidence, though I fear they’ve already hidden it. My heart is broken, and I dread telling my conservative family. I don’t know how to move forward.
